Little Miss Monogamy

Along came the Internet… Has social media sparked a resurgence of ‘free love’ in the West? Don’t judge too fast; this isn’t about whoring around (not that there’s anything wrong with it, but that’s what Tinder and Grindr are for). Instead imagine Match.com, Plenty of Fish or (dare I say) Christian Mingle—for triads. I mean, look around. Having a serious long-term relationship with multiple lovers isn’t so taboo after all.

For this piece from The Atlantic, Olga Khazan sat with a number of triads to figure out what spreading the love beyond ‘just the one’ is all about. Spoiler: they all make a pretty good case for it. Researchers put the number of polyamorous relationships in the U.S. at anywhere between half a million and 5 percent of all adults (about 12 million people). A sizable subset, although knowledge is limited. But:

The nascent research that does exist suggests these modern polyamorous relationships can be just as functional—and sometimes even more so—than traditional monogamous pairings.

Which got me thinking about how the medium might affect the development of intimacy amongst two or more people (or between one person and two or more people) over a given period of time, and how prolonged remote intimacy might affect the basic tenets of romance, like views on trust and exclusivity. New York already has its first polyamory-only building. Who knows, we might even see a “triad” box in the next census. (Pens ready.)

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