Comments on: Straight Acting

By: queer. sex. life. « leaves of the tree

queer. sex. life. « leaves of the tree — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 15:49:57 +0000

[...] in this instant classic (and perhaps soon-to-be seminal work) are for those willing to shed their heterosexual conditioning for a moment and delve into the dense and ever-evolving subculture that challenges the status quo [...]

By: bentcrude

bentcrude — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 23:48:15 +0000

interesting blog.

By: cdelatorre

cdelatorre — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 17:54:39 +0000

As promised, my review to queersexlife is up!

By: Chris Holden

Chris Holden — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 10:58:13 +0000

Intriguing stuff! And while I don’t disagree that A leads to B, which leads to C, etc. I wonder if the fact that we are a tribal species doesn’t in some way play into our treatment of the “Other”? In no way to justify this treatment, merely tossing it in the hopper.

Will definitely check out QueerSexLife. Thanks for the heads up.

By: cdelatorre

cdelatorre — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 18:24:01 +0000

From sexism comes homophobia and, dare I say, racism. It is the need to place man over woman, male over female, dominant over submissive, that forces these power struggles. The discomfort some men feel when they see feminine men or other men in feminine (i.e. submissive) roles, gives way to homophobia. It's the fear of somehow "losing one's manhood," I assume. The same ideals come into play with racism. The dominating class either sees the "other" as a threat or as submissive, and attempts to dominate accordingly. Foucault brilliantly discusses power struggles. I'm no expert, but when you really dig deep, most of this surfaces in common discourse and everyday narratives. It's all apparent in our everyday experience. Try Terry Goldie's QueerSexLife. I'm reviewing it now. The book is extremely enlightening, once you get past the occasional academic-speak (which I actually welcome in such an authoritative text). I'll link to my review here, once it's published.

By: Chris Holden

Chris Holden — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 12:58:10 +0000

You assumed correctly, indeed! My lazy phrasing turned my meaning on its head. Thanks much for catching and correcting. While I agree that feminism has been a blessing for society, I hope you’re right in feeling it will open up the door for a more–, what’s the word I’m looking for? How about … nuanced … approach to the male (and the female) and who and what we are. Wonder why my (or anyone’s, for that matter) outward mannerisms — in my case, effeminate, girlish, sissyish, name your poison — are so bothersome to people? I’m not consciously practicing in front of a mirror to appear feminine, I just naturally am more feminine. It’s who I am. Perhaps my mistake is in not standing before a mirror and practicing how to be more masculine! What are they afraid of? And thanks again for catching my mistake.

By: cdelatorre

cdelatorre — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 08:04:34 +0000

Thanks for your thoughts, Chris. I feel the same way; I assume you mean to write (last line) “we shouldn’t feel any need at all to publicly project…”? (Please correct me if I’m wrong.) Lucky for you that you should have a tougher hide than most. The coercive conformity of society to make all men appear and act a certain way is truly disgusting, to say the least. (And it’s perpetrated by both sexes, I think.) Disgusting because it shows a general lack of strength, courage and creativity. But there is the light at the end of the tunnel. And that light resides with the opposite sex. (Let’s thank our lucky stars for feminism!) We may love men. But that isn’t to say we hate women ;)

Thanks for reading!

By: Chris Holden

Chris Holden — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 22:10:08 +0000

As a gay man who is generally nailed as gay within minutes of meeting others (straight or gay), I obviously telegraph my gayness. Read: Effeminate. Yet, because this is who I have always been, I am not really aware that I am effeminate. I can’t recall, even as a youth, being teased or mocked for “girlish” mannerisms. Nor do I see myself as “flaming” or sissy-like”. So, I have never experienced the self-loathing which, unfortunately, so many gay men have. The sad fact is that, as gay men, we should feel any need at all to publicly project who and what we are.

By: a [recent] review of “Straight Acting” « leaves of the tree

a [recent] review of “Straight Acting” « leaves of the tree — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 04:40:13 +0000

[...] From the review: “It seems as if most of Straight Acting, and perhaps the bulk of Pezzote’s columns, is geared toward the self-loathing homosexual; the effeminite-at-heart who destructively seeks to be masculine, and the effeminite gay man who feels inferior or ugly because of his flamboyant tendencies. Yet, he preaches to a wide audience and in doing so, threatens to flip the prejudice on those gays who in fact positively identify as masculine. After all, being masculine is not any more wrong or misplaced for a gay male than is being effeminate, regardless of the current patriarchal societal trend, a viewpoint blurred as he suggests for us to ‘lower our shields of masculinity.’” READ MORE [...]